Tuesday, July 20, 2004

And Now we are Thirty

Well, what can I say - I've had a birthday that has launched me well beyond any misconception of still being a kid - I've hit 30.
When you're a twenty-something, you still think of yourself as young-ish, students are in their 20's for crying out loud. When you're twenty, you still have a close enough connection to the educational system, albeit the tertiary education system, but even that remains as a tenous last bastion of youth.
Now that I'm thirty, I get the impression that I should be a grown-up... you always think of things you'll do "...when you grow up..." and then WHAM! Someday being grown up just slaps you in your slowly settling ass and says "HA! I'm here -you're all grown up now!"
Now? So fast? (...are we there yet?)

All those years I spent trying to be so grown up and mature - fighting against my waning childhood with all my might. Now I just want it back. I don't think I want to grow up. And if it's happened to me already, well then, I just won't accept - I'll call Do over! home free, and no touchbacks.

Is it because I haven't done any of those typical "grown up" things, like get married, have a honeymoon and have kids? Is that why I don't feel like a grown up? I have a house - and my own little family ("...oh there are five beings in my family...") a very significant significant other, two cats and a dog.

Does anyone ever truly "feel" like a grown up? I wonder, if all those other grown ups out there still think of themselves as big kids, still loving life and trying to treat every day as an adventure? There is no way for me to know, I can only hope that they do.

For my thirtieth birthday, I spent the day swimming up north in Georgian Bay, jumping off high rocks (and low rocks) into the water with my boyfriend and my dog - I sure felt like a kid, even if the concept of time says differently.

Here's to the inner kid in all of us, and may they never grow old.


1 comment:

EndersGrandma said...

Well said, oh very young one! You're only as young as you feel, be that 30 or 22!
Splash in the puddles as long as you can!
You should really be writing for a publication you know, you have a wonderful way with words!
love mom